Mother Eve

My admiration for Eve rushed in when I went through the Temple for the first time back in 2015. I was overwhelmed with love and gratitude on a deeper level for her. Growing up, I had an understanding that Eve was duped into partaking of the fruit. The word "beguiled" seemed to give off that idea.

"Dr. Nehama Aschenasy, a Hebrew scholar, said that in Hebrew the word which is translated as beguiled in the Bible does not mean "tricked" or " deceived" as we commonly think. Rather, the Hebrew word is a rare verb that indicates an intense multilevel experience evoking great emotional, psychological, and/or spiritual trauma. As Aschenasy explained, it is likely that Eve's intense, multilevel experience, this " beguiling" by the serpent was the catalyst that caused Eve to ponder and evaluate what her role in tbe Garden really was." (The Gift of Giving Life: Re-discovering the Divine Nature of Pregnancy and Birth, pgs.2-3)

I believe that Eve pondered and understood with so much depth her role in God's plan of happiness. She is the Mother of All Living! She was foreordained to fill that role and she fulfilled it with grace!

"In his vision of the redemption of the dead, President Joseph F. Smith saw the prophets assembled in paradise: "Among the great and almighty ones who were assembled in this vast congregation of the righteous were Father Adam, ...and our glorious Mother Eve, with many of her faithful daughters who had lived through the ages."

 I loved her role as Adams wife. She loved him deeply and covenanted that she would stand by his side. She was a strength to him. I can only imagine how deeply Adam loved and trusted her as he also chose to partake of the fruit. Together they covenanted with God and through the storms of life, they prevailed. This beautiful, woman of God fulfilled God's will for her and I wish to emulate her example. I just love her!

Love Letters #15

"Today's #LIGHTtheWORLD is about showing compassion and it got me thinking about raw emotion. Something that I've become more familiar with as I go through this life. I think one of the most satisfying and fulfilling moments you can have with someone is showing love on a raw, emotional level. And while you may not fully understand how the other person feels, you feel with them as best as you can.

I was once talking with a friend about marriage and the type of man that I wanted to marry. I think my list has evolved from a long complicated and unrealistic list to a very short, simple one.

• A man who honors and respects his Priesthood.
• Sense of humor
• Kind, thoughtful, and caring
• Emotionally intelligent supportive

That last one doesn't mean anything big. I don't want a psychiatrist or counselor. It just means one who will show compassion during those times when others are having a very human moment. Often times, it's easy to feel uncomfortable during those moments when others are being vulnerable. I know, I've been there on both sides! Or there will be times when we just brush it off and tell someone it's going to be fine without really hearing them. I just want someone who will love deeply during those raw moments. I feel those moments and I don't need you to fix it. I just want you to love me through it and to show kindness and patience. 

That's how Jesus Christ is, especially during His life here. He comforted so many who suffered their own raw pain. He loved them through it. He does that with us now. His love and mercy is always there for us. Christ-like love encompasses compassion, mercy, love, and charity. It is the very healing balm that can soothe any weathered heart. 

I really want that for our marriage. I want to emulate Christ-like love to you. I may not perfectly understand everything, but that's fine. That's what Jesus Christ does. But I can love you through it. I can be patient with you and hold your hand. We weren't meant to be alone. We were meant to love and serve each other during all seasons of life. 

I'm not asking for perfection. I'm just asking for compassion."

Read last entry here: http://itsnottheworst.blogspot.com/2016/12/love-letters-14.html

Plain and Precious Truths #6

"Behold, thy sins are forgiven thee, and thou art an elect lady, whom I have called."

"Murmur not because of the things which thou has not see, for they are withheld from thee and from the world, which is wisdom in me in a time to come." 

"And the office of thy calling shall be for a comfort unto my servant, Joseph Smith, Jun., thy husband, in his afflictions, with consoling words, in the spirit of meekness."  

-D&C 25 3-5

Emma Smith is one of the women that I look up to. She's a strong woman who endured through much pain and affliction. I can't imagine being in her shoes and having to carry the burdens that she had. I love this chapter in Doctrine and Covenants, because it was revelation specifically for her. I had a tender moment as I read this chapter, because it I could feel the love that God had specifically for her. God saw her as His precious daughter. Amongst all the pain she went through, God was with her.

I absolutely adored that she was called to be a comfort to her husband. Seriously, relationship goals right there. More than anything, I desire to be there for my (future) husband to love and support him. Emma was a solid example of that as she supported Joseph Smith through such horrendous times. I believe Emma is an example of continuing to follow the Lord, even through so much heartache. She truly is an elect lady and one that I admire so deeply.

Read the last entry of the series here: http://itsnottheworst.blogspot.com/2016/07/plain-and-precious-truths-5.html

Here's a beautiful song about Emma Smith sung by Katherine Nelson.

Never had an ordinary day,

never lived your life in an ordinary way.

For everything  you loved, you paid a price,

But you couldn't let the world see your cry.

Never had a moment of peace,

never felt the sunlight, when your worries set you free.

Every time your life turned a page,

it seemed like your heart might break.

Chorus:

With the world on your shoulders, when the nights had grown colder,

you seemed to weather every storm with a Queen's grace.

And when you lost your husband, when you buried your children,

I'm sure the angels stood in reverence as your prayed.

How much can one heart take?

How much can one heart take?

Never had a day to call your own.

when so many needed your warm heart as a home.

 Whispering a mother's lullaby, as you sat alone by the fire.

Chorus x 2

I'm sure you heart breaks, when some people still say

somewhere down the line you lost your faith.

How much can one heart take?

How much one heart take?

Love Letters #7 - Journal Entry

I had requests for a love letter and journal entry post. So I thought since it's February 1st, I would start out love month with a love letter in the form of a journal entry. Which isn't any different than past love letter posts. But I'm still killing two birds with one... heart. (Just tryin' to keep up with the love theme here!)

"I've been studying a lot about shame and a few months ago I jumped on the Brene Brown train. That took studying shame to a new level! It's been a very hard battle- fighting shame that is. I know that it's not an uncommon thing for people to feel shame. You don't necessarily have to do something that would be considered shameful. It can be felt in even the smallest ways. It's part of the human experience. I fear being vulnerable. I'm not an "open book" and I don't want you to think less of me if I share a very vulnerable part of me. I want to be loved and accepted. And it's so much easier for me to love and accept you, because it's inspiring and motivating. But when I turn inward, it's the complete opposite. I don't feel like I deserve to be loved and accepted, even though that's desperately what I want. So I'm studying shame, so that I can work through the personal shame I feel. I want to have the courage to be able to give myself fully to you. I want to be able to open up to you and still be able to keep my head up. I want to be able to connect with you, but I can't if I am guarded by shame. I admit it hasn't been an easy road. It's hard for me to own my story. It takes baby steps. It takes forgiveness. It takes lots of tear-filled prayers. It takes turning to God and our Savior, Jesus Christ. It takes courage. It's hard. But you're worth it!"

On a completely different note...I filed my taxes today. I'd say this month is off to a good start! More posts to come. (Mainly because you guys yell at me when I don't post. Sorry. Not sorry. Also, seriously? You guys want more pictures?! Check. Out. My. Instagram. Jk, I'll do my best.)

Check out the last sappy love letter by clicking riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight here.

Love Letters #5

"I am human in every sense. I struggle. And I want you to see that I struggle, but then I don't at the same time. I want to be strong for you all the time. And I know there are going to be times when being strong for you is allowing you to see that I struggle. I take time to process things and I know you know that. Just don't pull back when I share with you a very human part of me. I know you wouldn't. The more I accept my imperfect self, the easier it is for me to accept imperfect people; the imperfect you. I love the imperfect you. It shows me that you are human too. Together we'll just walk this life imperfectly, but we'll learn and grow. And we won't be alone. You and me, sir! Thank you for being accepting of the imperfect me. I love that. And I love you." 

***

Missed the previous sap, here it is:

• Love Letter #4
• Love Letter #3
• Love Letter #2
• Love Letter #1

Love Letter #1

"Call me crazy, but I totally people watch. It's kind of similar to creeping, but that tends to be frowned upon in most cases. Anyways, I was people watching and watched several couples interactions. Here are my findings:

You have the couple who just giggles in the corner of the room. They're probably whispering sweet nothings in each others ears. Who knows?

Next, you have the couple who sit across from each other "studying", when really they are checking each other out when the other isn't looking. It's on going. I think the guy is winning. 

And to my right, we have the touchy couple on the couch. I don't need to paint that picture for you.

I love to observe and analyze them in the way they interact. I love seeing the way each individual treats their love. 

All this got me thinking about YOU. Yes, YOU! I sometimes allow my mind to think about us. I mean, which couple are we like? I imagine us being crazy funny. No doubt we probably laugh all the time. And you know how I dearly love to laugh. It keeps us young, you know! But yet, we have such a gentle side that really brings the fire to our friendship. I'm glad we built our foundation rock solid (no pun intended), so that our friendship, love, and marriage will take us to eternity and beyond! So let's keep pressing forward, okay? We've got lots to do, places to see, love to build, and much more!

Now can I tell you about something that really hit me today? I had been feeling really down lately about the idea of divorce. Divorce rates are through the roof! Finances, infidelity, pornography, gambling--just a few factors that lead to divorce. The idea of divorce, really set a fear inside my heart. That's not even an option in my book! I was working on a project, with music playing in the background, when a song began playing that I had never heard The lyrics were beautiful! I had to look them up and write them down, so that I could share with you. They were so enveloping and comforting to that dear 'ole heart of mine. A tender mercy, no doubt from God! 

I'll Be There - Brighten

Someday you'll make a promise
Yeah one you'll wanna keep
There will never be a question love
You're making it with me

No one said that it'd be easy
When trouble comes around
I will never let you fall dear
And you will never let me down

Ooh, I know
Ooh, I know
It's gonna be a long hard ride
It's gonna be a long hard ride
But I'll be there

Our jobs are taking over
The world's become so hard
We will learn as we grow older
We're stronger than they are

Just love me forever
Just love me forever

Ooh, I know
Ooh, I know
It's gonna be a long, hard ride
It's gonna be a long, hard ride
I'll be there

You're probably thinking how cheesy I am--just remember, that you asked me to marry you. (I know, I know, I was the one who said yes.) Together, we work to make our marriage work. Always. And that's what I want you to know. 

Right now, this very second for you, I am telling you right now that I love you. I made covenants with you in the Temple and I will always hold them dear to my heart. Nothing can stop us from reaching eternity! Sure, our lives might not be perfect this very moment in our lives, but I will never give up on us. When the weight of the world is on our shoulders, let's show them that "we're stronger than they are." And with God, babe we got it all! We've got this! Satan can't tear us apart. 

Right now, this very second for me, I am telling you right now that I love you. Sure, I don't know you yet, but that doesn't matter. I pray for you every. single. day. I'm doing my best to strengthen my relationship with God, so that I can better love and serve you. Sure, my life right now isn't perfect, but I will never give up on us. When the weight of the world is on my shoulder, I just remind myself that the same is probably happening to you too. Satan can't stop me from preparing myself for you. And with God, babe we got it all!

Don't give up! Keep going. "Someday you'll make a promise...you're making it with me." If you're feeling all warm and fuzzy right now, you should think about taking me out for ice cream. Just an idea...I'm full of those!"