Goodbye August, Hello September

I know. It's been a month since I've posted. I packed up my life. Moved to Orem. Drove to Idaho for family vacay the day after. Drove home. Packed up my apartment in Orem. Moved home. It all happened so fast. But I trusted the Lord.

I've grown a lot this month. With my business and personally. I've immersed myself in thought provoking books that have caused me to change the way I think. I've been trying to immediately change my thoughts if they are not positive. It's been a...a lot of effort and practice. But it's getting easier. August was a good month!

So what now, September? What do you have to offer me? What do I want to accomplish this month? Growing my business of course. Blogging more. (That's always one.) Cook more often. Save some dollar bills. Hit the pavement more. Maybe yoga. (And you know I hate yoga.) Establish a better routine. Prepare for conference.

This month marks one year of the best revelation I had ever received. And I still hold strong to those promises. I know my 'why' and I know what direction I want to go. So it's time to put the pedal to the medal!

I choose to focus on how far I've come and where I'm going. Progression sometimes feels slow, but August I really grew a lot! My business causes me to branch out of myself and work. I love it! I choose to focus only on positive things that will keep my energy and vibrations high. I choose to immediately forgive myself an ask for God's forgiveness. I choose to love more and to give more of my time. God only will I serve! My 'why' is my vision and my vision is on fire! The timing has never been more perfect!

Let's go, September!

Love Letters #17

Patience is needed.

Waiting for you to connect.

One day it will end.

Read last entry in series here: http://itsnottheworst.blogspot.com/2017/05/love-letters-15.html

God is so Good!!!

"And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, an that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions." - Mosiah 24:14

Today's scripture study had me reading this particular verse and I needed it! The Lord has really been pushing me in a certain direction and it's been easy at times and hard other times. I've felt a lot of pain, self doubt and many other emotions that I just couldn't take anymore. But today, my spirit came alive when I read these words. And I could be angry with God, but I'm not. I am never mad at Him. I know that He is pushing me in the direction that I need to be.

I deeply love my God! And He is so good to me. I have felt Him ease my burden today. I am so grateful for this experience. I don't see it as a trial, rather an experience of growth and understanding. It's in these moments that I find myself humbled and deeply connected to my creator. I love Him and I know that He loves me. God is good, He is oh so good!

Comfortable with the Uncomfortable

I am being empowered to become more than I have ever desired for myself. It's so neat how the Lord just throws me into something that is so uncomfortable for me. And the more I am pushing myself to do the unthinkable, the easier and more inspired I am becoming. Over the weekend I hit a moment of self doubt. I felt so dark and unsure of everything. But this week, I have felt so inspired with this business! If you didn't know, I am distributor with It Works! Global and have been since the end of May. It's been a growing experience for me, because this is something I never saw myself doing. But God just kept pushing me to do this and I've been having to become comfortable with the uncomfortable. My mentors have been everything that I needed, especially after a weekend that was so emotionally hard. I've never felt so inspired to reach my potential and make my vision board a reality. And let me tell you something, the law of attraction really does work. It's been so cool to see things on my vision board manifest themselves. I am attracting like minded people who have similar goals and drives to become something more. 

It's not the worst! And bravo to Eleanor Roosevelt for speakin' truth!

Comparison

was just leveling off after being on a spiritual high. I'm still figuring out all these decisions and literally livin' on a prayer. So then Flo came and made things worse. I became so deeply immersed in past pain. I could feel myself hustling for validation, belonging, and love. Satan is real and so are his followers. (I have a long post about that later.) I longed for the past me. I longed for a false sense of security that I so heavily relied on. I was comparing myself to everyone around me and I felt small.

Comparison is like an old friend to me. I often felt like I was being compared to other people all growing up. And I feel like it's natural where we admire the people around us, but that admiration turns to some form of shame down on our end. If you're like me, then you start to feel a tinge of jealousy come in and the followed by raging tears. I really despise the feelings of jealousy, sadness, and feeling worthless. Especially when they're mixed into one. (And even more when Flo comes to town.)

During Relief Society, I walked into an empty classroom and knelt down in sincere prayer and then laid on the floor and just breathed. After a while of breathing, I got up and walked up to the white board and wrote out my truths.

I am a Daughter of God.

I am a Disciple of Jesus Christ.

I radiate the light of Christ.

I am beautiful.

I am successful. 

I am diamond. 

I am kind, thoughtful, and caring.

I am strong.

Those truths empowered me to take a stand against the adversary. Enough. I am not a victim. I will not give others power to make myself so. I am a constantly changing. I am a different person than I was a year ago, five years ago, even ten years ago! I choose to look at myself as a whole person. And I choose to look at others as a whole person. I forgive myself and I forgive others. 

Everyone has bad days, couple days, weeks. It's called life. But I encourage you to try reciting your truths and allow your spirit come alive. You'll feel and see a difference. I truly believe that as you feed yourself truth, your true your higher self will come out. I believe that when you are deep within your higher self, you won't have a need to compare yourself to others. Why? Because instead,  you'll be viewing others as their higher self. You'll remember who they truly are and the need to compare won't even be there.

What am I doing?

A question I've been asking myself all week. What am I doing? Imagine me face planted on the floor. Like Sadness from Inside Out. I feel like I'm emotionally hustling for something. Is it acceptance? Is it belonging? Is it validation? I don't know. But I feel weird. I feel like I'm just running around in a thick cloud of fog. Sometimes I feel like Wonder Woman when she takes a moment, closes her eyes and faces the sky. Composure as I call it. I just have to take a deep breath and bask in that very moment to put myself together. Every night, I will lay very still and feel myself breathe while my mind takes its time to slow down. Maybe this is why I need to meditate more? Or do yoga? I don't know, but whatever it is, I need to find some more peace.

It's not the worst.