Comparison

was just leveling off after being on a spiritual high. I'm still figuring out all these decisions and literally livin' on a prayer. So then Flo came and made things worse. I became so deeply immersed in past pain. I could feel myself hustling for validation, belonging, and love. Satan is real and so are his followers. (I have a long post about that later.) I longed for the past me. I longed for a false sense of security that I so heavily relied on. I was comparing myself to everyone around me and I felt small.

Comparison is like an old friend to me. I often felt like I was being compared to other people all growing up. And I feel like it's natural where we admire the people around us, but that admiration turns to some form of shame down on our end. If you're like me, then you start to feel a tinge of jealousy come in and the followed by raging tears. I really despise the feelings of jealousy, sadness, and feeling worthless. Especially when they're mixed into one. (And even more when Flo comes to town.)

During Relief Society, I walked into an empty classroom and knelt down in sincere prayer and then laid on the floor and just breathed. After a while of breathing, I got up and walked up to the white board and wrote out my truths.

I am a Daughter of God.

I am a Disciple of Jesus Christ.

I radiate the light of Christ.

I am beautiful.

I am successful. 

I am diamond. 

I am kind, thoughtful, and caring.

I am strong.

Those truths empowered me to take a stand against the adversary. Enough. I am not a victim. I will not give others power to make myself so. I am a constantly changing. I am a different person than I was a year ago, five years ago, even ten years ago! I choose to look at myself as a whole person. And I choose to look at others as a whole person. I forgive myself and I forgive others. 

Everyone has bad days, couple days, weeks. It's called life. But I encourage you to try reciting your truths and allow your spirit come alive. You'll feel and see a difference. I truly believe that as you feed yourself truth, your true your higher self will come out. I believe that when you are deep within your higher self, you won't have a need to compare yourself to others. Why? Because instead,  you'll be viewing others as their higher self. You'll remember who they truly are and the need to compare won't even be there.